The Worst Sentence To Ask On Netflix

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

Yesterday (Monday) evening the wife uttered the worst sentence on Netflix to myself and daughter.

The sentence was....wait for it...

"Let's watch a film tonight on Netflix together.

I find with Netflix that it's great when you're alone. You've made your decision. That's it. When it's two then one side relents to keep the peace but when there is more than two people involved then a UN negotiator is required.

In the olden days there might have still been arguments. But your choice would have been limited to whatever was recorded and/or whatever unwatched VHS/DVD you have. But what Netflix (other streaming services are available) have done is to widen the choice, thus by widening the choice you widen the arguments and therefore widen the length of time before you all come to a decision.

We took ten to fifteen minutes before making a decision.

The process went like this:

Wife insisted on a film. No couple of episodes of a TV series was acceptable. I and daughter would have been OK with a TV show.

Wife didn't want any superhero movies. Me and daughter would have been happy with watching them though as I said before there's surprisingly not that many)

Wife didn't want subtitled films. I/daughter would have had no problems with subtitled.

Wife suggested Jaws. Now Jaws is a movie I've never seen. Had no problems with that. Daughter wasn't interested.

Daughter (and to a lesser extent wife) was interested in various movies which had some permutation on teenage girl and possibly a high school prom. I said no. I just knew I'd get bored and fall asleep and they'd have a go at me around my snoring figure (mind you on reflection perhaps it would have cured my insomnia).

Eventually after a lot of heated words we eventually settled on a film. Central Intelligence (2016) starring Kevin Hart and Dwayne Johnson. And once finished the family was united.

It was the worst film we'd seen in a long while.

To put it at it's most basic without spoiling what could be called a plot Hart and Johnson are an odd couple pairing caught together in stopping the bad guys.

The best scene in the movie is the first. Goes downhill from then on. Cast is accomplished and can only presume they agreed to appear as loved ones were being held in captivity.

I'll pick three things (trust me could have picked a load more) to illustrate this.

1) Johnson stays the night at Hart's house. The sofa bed is a mess in the morning. Hart is about to complain when the door rings. It's the CIA. When they go into the room where Johnson has been sleeping not only has he gone but has tidied up the room too.

2) Johnson gets hit by a motorbike. And yet not a mark is on him. He may be The Rock but come on.

3) I knew who the secret villain was going to be from the moment of introduction. So obvious the TV might as well have shown flashing lights to alert everyone.

So there you have it. Whatever your choice of film from Netflix there's at least one to avoid.

Until the next time.