The Near Midnight Meanderings On A Movie With A Microwave Meal Part 16: Time Lock (1957)

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

A six year old boy is trapped in a bank safe on a Friday afternoon that has a time lock on it so that it won't open until Monday morning. Parents are worried. Bank officials are worried. Police/doctors/ Canada are worried.

But I'm not bothered.

Why? Well let's put it this way. It's a commercial film made in the late 1950's. You may not know the route but it's obvious what the destination will be. Essentially it's a fancy updating of the child falling in a well tales.

And therein lies this movie's biggest problem. Once you realise that then there's no tension. You watch it as if forced to see a recording of a sports match where you already know the score. And rather like when you're forced to watch the sports game your mind starts to wander.

The first thing I notice is that it's based on a play by Arthur Hailey. Now I've mentioned before that he is one of my favourite "bestseller" writers (ie a writer who has deliberately set out to write a bestseller). Even as a child of about ten I'd worked out his formula. Set the story mainly in one large location like an airport. Scatter characters with different stories as if throwing jigsaw pieces on a table and then slowly piece it all together.

This was obviously written before he'd worked the formula out. Here the characters with really one exception are immediately at the bank trying to get the boy out (yawn).

The other real surprise is that the screenplay is written by Peter Thomas and produced by his brother Gerald. The people responsible for the Carry On movies. No intentional laughs here folks though. A few unintentional ones mind. Like the scene early on where the bank manager rings head office asking for the phone number of a director to tell him what's happened. Firstly as it's the weekend head office has shut down so the janitor answers. Secondly he gives the bank manager the number without any security checks whatsoever!

It's set in Alberta but made on the thinnest of shoestrings in Britain. Given there are a few scenes away from the bank you really could have just put [Insert North American city here]. No geographical landmarks here folks.

Acted by people I've never heard of before (that of course means nothing) but with one exception. It was Sean Connery's first speaking role. What was the acting like? Let's put it this way. The best performer was the safe

Black and white and in every respect cheap all over if you like full on blowtorch action then this is the movie for you. Otherwise lock yourself away for it's duration.

For British Institutions In Changing Times : Let's Chat As A Reader About W H Smith

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

A few days back I read online an article that bothered me. It said that of all the shops in the high street W H Smith was the rudest and less customer friendly.

So let me say at the outside that I've never experienced anything in terms of the people working there other than staff trying their best to help in the best customer friendly manner possible.

It does not mean however that W H Smith is not without it's problems.

Whilst it never solely sold books for most people in the seventies and eighties and even so now the closest thing you would have to a bookshop near you was W H Smith. For a bookworm like me it opened up a whole world of literature growing up. Starting with the stuff for kids then moving on to more adult fare.

And whether it was the classics, modern works or pure unadulterated bestseller fare like Arthur Hailey there was a good chance that W H Smith would have it, or at the very least was capable of ordering it for you.

Now however something is wrong. If we judge things purely on books then it has suffered obviously from the likes of Amazon online. Also when it comes bestseller type books the entrance of the big supermarket chains damaged them as well. They are therefore squeezed between the two.

When you walk into the shop now it looks like a bazaar in the way they try to sell books with bargains. Thing is they are for the most part not that cheap for new books compared to their competitors.

So it's not a surprise that they diversify far more than they used to. The space for books is gradually reducing for other things so what W H Smith is no longer is a place where you would automatically enter the world of books. It just battles in the High Street with the rest of them.

And it's important. For in most towns W H Smith is the only place where you could anything close to a range of books. Should the choice continue to lessen then the effect on the love of reading could be damaging for future generations.

Until the next time.

The Big Mac Novel

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

Well Jack O'Judgement by Edgar Wallace is finished. Let my say at the outset that I liked it a lot in a sort of don't think about it wallow in it sort of way. Rather like the Sir Walter Scott historical novel The Talisman that I chatted about recently as long as you don't take it seriously you'll be fine. This book is, to use an old expression, a rattling good yarn.

(Must admit that I'd been waiting for a while for an another writer that I could say I disliked one book but liked the next one. Did not expect it to be Edgar Wallace!)

But when it was finished it made me realised that what I was reading was what I would like to call a Big Mac novel.

The thing about a Big Mac is this. You want it, you eat it,you've enjoyed it. But soon after you've forgotten all about it. A Big Mac novel is a work where the writer has specifically set out to write a bestseller. You've read it, let's say you've enjoyed it, but soon it'll just escape your mind.

When I was a teenager/in my twenties many Jack Higgins/HarryPatterson novels were consumed in the mistaken belief that I too could be a rough tough man's man (especially when I took my glasses off). But The Eagle Has Landed aside I can barely only remember some of the plots of the books and have forgotten many more. Ditto Dick Francis. And as for Alistair Maclean could not tell you the plots of his novels other than those that were made into films (and let me say here, his books were dull the films were better).

Or perhaps Frederick Forsyth is a better example. After his first three thrillers can anyone really recall a book of his? Or for the ladies Barbara Cartland, a woman who produced so many romantic novels I'd be amazed if she could remember the plot of them all let alone the reader.

(Of course there are exceptions. One of my favourite "Big Mac" writers as I've mentioned before was Arthur Hailey, author of Airport and Hotel and whose ebook versions of his novels sell for the astonishly high price of six pounds)

You could just say that this is because I'm a man in his fifties. Something I can't deny. But there are many other books I can remember reading at that time that I can recall now as if it was yesterday. Also, can you drag from the memory the plot of all the James Patterson (plus one other) thrillers you've read?

I'm not being snobbish. There's nothing wrong with having a Big Mac medium meal. I had one last Friday.....

(A quick aside here that was a mistake. I'd finished the afternoon/evening shift at work and for reasons that I won't bother you with needed to get something outside of the house for dinner. Well after ten o'clock on a Friday evening going through the drive through in my Kia Picanto surrounded by the young dudes and dudettes in their flashy over the top shiny alloyed wheeled cars made it the longest time I've ever had to hang round there for a burger)

.....but it's just that a fuller meal is better.

The next book randomly picked, which yet again seems to show that my Kindle has a sense of humour is the first part of the three cities trilogy, Lourdes by Emile Zola. Firstly because this weekend has been all Francais due to the election of Emmanuel Macron. The new President has already pronounced that he's going to seek the transfer of jobs from the City of London to France due to Brexit. Must admit that I'm going to have absolutely no sympathy for anybody there who loses their job who in the past practically wet themselves with excitement because a company closed offices/factories for "efficiency savings" in Britain despite the human/social consequences because it sent the share price up (but note before you call me a "traitor" or a "saboteur" I'm talking about those people only).

And it's also rather funny that having never read Emile Zola before this year I have in the past few months read a book about him and a short story (The Flood - Worth reading).

Must admit it shows that I'm more ignorant of France than I thought. I never realised that Lourdes was a city. You learn something everyday. Such as never go to a Mcdonalds drive through on a Friday night.

Until the next time.

On House Hunting In South Wales And Ebook Hunting In The Amazon

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

Yesterday then. Earmarked for initial house viewings. Saving time. The idea explained before is that as I'm working afternoon/evening shift for the next five days (this excludes Sunday) I would look at three houses and should I like them then they move on to face the more stricter test of wife/daughter on Saturday.

Four houses were earmarked. As it turned out however it would only be three that I would see. The fourth, when I was trying to arrange an appointment, went something like this.

"Well you see there have been two offers " said the estate agent "but we have been unable to reach the owners. I don't know what's happened".

All very well (actually all very not well) but the question remained why was this house still on the website? Of course didn't actually ask. I might need his help again in the future.

What this meant was that for Penarth and surrounding areas I had three viewings. One for nine thirty in the morning, the remainder for twelve and twelve thirty..........yes I know.

House number one was a relatively (I'm guessing thirty years) bedroomed modern house. It was OK. It certainly needed a bit of love in the decoration department but it was certainly livable. The downside, even allowing for our downsizing intention, was the kitchen part of the kitchen diner. It was just too small in the area of cupboard space (something like a wardrobe the wife never has enough of) and there was no obvious place for a tumble dryer. Still, it had enough going for it to be considered a maybe.

I then had about two hours to spare wandering around the streets of Penarth. Part of which was spent in a couple of estate agents I'd missed when first doing a trawl of them in January. One gave me a group of pamphlets with houses that were in our price range. The other was a combined lettings/estate agent firm. The estate agent was not there when I'd arrived so gave someone from the lettings side my email address assuming that a list of available houses was going to come my way. At time of writing no such list has come my way.

Otherwise had an early lunch of two sausage rolls washed down with Lucozade. Gastonome that I am.

Arrived early for house number two. A four bedroom semi detached just a few streets away from house number one. I spent the time whilst waiting staring to read Lorna Doone by R D Blackmore. The sort of classic book you feel you should read before you die.

(The observant amongst you would realise that I've finished the Christina Rossetti poetry collection. To be honest it was the sort of thing that my opinion of is best described as a shrug).

What I hadn't understood from looking at the website was why the prices of house number one and two were so similar given that this one had an extra bedroom. The answers revealed themselves as you walked in. Not only did the house need decoration it also seemed to need cleaning from top to bottom as well some bits of plastering......and carpeting. Work had been done but whatever had been planned for this house it was unfinished.

The estate agent revealed why. Apparently the current owners had decided to divorce and just stopped the improvements in the house there and then. Obviously it's not for me to discuss their affairs (and let me stress I've no idea nor should I know) but I would've understood if it was following emotional recriminations of adultery but not because they had enough of each other. It seemed to have made more sense to have sorted the house out before going their separate ways.

But none of the above issues were the reason I rejected it. Neither was the lack of wardrobe space in the main bedroom.

No it was the mould.

And in a very unusual place too. Either side of the bed by the floor in that main bedroom. The estate agent said that she hadn't noticed it before. She suggested getting an expert to look at it but really that was clutching at straws. Rejected.

House number three was an end three bedroomed terraced Victorian house and I loved it. The bathroom was the first time in this whole process that I went wow. The place had character, charm and adequate space for our needs.

But there was an elephant in the room, or rather out of the room, and out of the house...parking.

The photo in the website suggested that it was on a street corner. There wasn't a corner. There's some sort of building and then a corner  There was a parking permit on a first come first served basis but as we have two cars the best place for the other is a quiet street around the corner which obviously would involve a walk. A maybe.

Later when I was at home and the wife came in I showed her the two houses I considered maybes. She threw even more doubts on house number three, disliking the kitchen colours for the cupboard (what?) and the bathroom (how dare she!) and laughing mockingly when I mentioned the parking problem. I suspect that the parking will be the thing that will kill house number three off. She will be seeing it on Saturday however.

Wife has also surprised me by being interested in a house amongst the leaflets one of the estate agents gave me when I had time to fill in Penarth. Surprised because this house is further from Penarth than I'd expected her to consider. So on Saturday afternoon she and daughter will be visiting three houses.....lucky them.

As until I've moved/settled all of my reading is going to be Kindle based I decided to temporarily change my book buying whilst waiting for that day. So instead of a £1 a week looking for a vintage Penguin/Pelican paperback I've decided on the first of every month to spend up to £5 on ebooks.

For the most part my Kindle is filled by classic books that are free (hence Lorna Doone) or by by cheap "daily deals" Amazon do. I'd read and enjoyed Victoria Coren's autobiography of her experiences playing poker,For Richer For Poorer, for just 99p (as I've mentioned before I loved it though I still couldn't tell you the rules of the game....or is it a sport?).

I also bought the Life of Pi by Yann Martel for 20p. Which, having read it, is nineteen pence too much.

So I started on the Amazon "Daily Deal". Nothing of any interest to me. Which is a shame as out of curiosity I looked at the deal the day before and it included books by Carrie Fisher which I would have bought.

Moved on to the "Monthly Deal". Most either were, or seemingly written in the style of a bestseller. None of them seemed to appeal to me as much they used to as a teenager.

(A quick aside here. I'm not against bestselling books - which I'm classing here as books specifically written to make money - it's just I suspect an age thing in terms of what I'm interested in now as a man in my fifties. Mind you. I did out of curiosity look for Arthur Hailey, one of my favourite "bestselling" writers and was shocked to find that they were on sale, as an ebook , for over six pounds!)

There was "We Need To Talk About Kevin" by Lionel Shriver but as a parent I was avoiding that really out of fear.

Only then did I notice Gorky Park by Martin Cruz Smith for just 99p. I remember the book when it came out in 1981. It was one of those that you mean to read but somehow life interferes. Well opportunity knocked (don't have a doorbell) and it was bought.

Looked at the "Readers Who Bought This Also Bought". Most were subsequent books in the Renko series which were of course more expensive for this exercise. Also though noticed March Violets by Philip Kerr. This is the first book in the Bernie Gunther series of private eye novels set in Nazi Germany. It was both interesting and also at 99p cheap. Bought.

Having gone through the list looked at what Amazon were "recommending" for me. One of them turned out to be Das Kapital by Karl Marx. I've remarked before how I seem to be unusual in having drifted leftwards politically the older I've got. It would be interesting on reading this seminal work how left wing I've actually become. It was also 99p. Bought. Karl Marx as a bargain. Wonder when that was last said?

There were a number of cheap omnibus books by various (now dead) writers but the problem was that in one form or another I'd already got at least some of these. But casting my eye on the Amazon recommendations I noticed Oblomov the classic Russian novel by Ivan Goncharov. It was 99p,it was cheap, it was bought.

Having gone through the "Readers Who Bought Oblomov also bought" bit, I found A Hero Of Our Time by Mikhail Lermontov. Never heard of this book before but apparently it's a Russian classic and the plot seemed intriguing. It was also 76p.Bought

And so it finished. Three books with a Russian connection, two with a German one. Or, Two thrillers, two classic novels and a work of political theory. Whatever that says about me I don't know. Probably Amazon do though.

Until the next time.