In Which I'm Losing Connections With My Daughter And Bruce Chatwin Doesn't Help

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

As the title suggests as she is growing older I feel as if I'm losing connections with my daughter (who is nearly fifteen) of course that happens to all parents as their children grow older and assert their independence more. What I didn't realise (and probably should have) is that when you have a girl then it's Dad who this will affect first....specifically because he's Dad.

For as she gets older specific issues and interests arise where I, in my official capacity as Dad, have absolutely no clue what to do. For example...

Hair: As regular readers of this blog know I have enough problems with my own silver thatch to understand the problems of young women. For cutting as well as styling "Ask your mother" is my response.

Make Up: To the majority of men. Makeup is a sort of biological chemistry set for which we barely have an idea what these strange substances and implements are. Another "Ask Your mother" issue.

Fashion: Daughter never likes my comments on what she's wearing. Wife thinks I'm "behind the times". So if I make a comment Daughter's response is to ask her mother.

And fashion leads to.....

Shopping For Clothes: Many years ago. When my wife was choosing a top for what seemed like an eternity I remarked to my daughter that one day she would be exactly like her mother. Well that time has come. And if I'm dragged into this kicking and screaming at what to them is not so much shopping more of an event then my only true companion is whatever book I'm reading.

And of course there's ......

Boys: Where I suspect I'll be the last person to know about a boyfriend until she's in her twenties and there's a ring involved.

As for television. Daughter is a fan of film musicals and dance/song talent shows.....as is the wife ....no interest in anything that involves sport and a ball at all.

Now this is no competition. I now know that even if I intended to make it so I'd lose heavily. I'm a man, and at this age my daughter's interests/needs are best served by her mother.

And I do have responsibilities. Though not "popular" ones. Homework enforcer, unwelcome alarm clock on school days and of course taxi. But it's not the same.

I was mulling on this yesterday as I was waiting outside daughter's school. Then decided instead to finish In Patagonia by Bruce Chatwin. So let me confirm what I said on Sunday. I hated this book.

You know it's odd disliking a book not only popular but loved.But there we go. I hated the short chapters. The way he seemed to act superior to the indigenous people. The way history was jammed in and then rammed out. There was nothing smooth about this at all.

Not the worst book I've read this year. But so far unquestionably the most disappointing.

Went to Sully library and took out two books. This was the first:

Charlotte Betts -The Chateau On The Lake

I'm not expecting much here except being hopefully entertained.

The other was:

Alan Baker - The Edge Of Science

No idea what to expect here. We shall see.

As for what to do with my daughter. The answer I reckon is to find new interests where we can connect more. For the moment it turns out to be Ice Hockey. Since we went to the Cardiff Devils match last week I've recorded some more games on TV and amazingly she wants to watch them with her old man.

Father daughter bonding over ice hockey....thank you ice hockey.

Until the next time.

Devils On Ice

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

I like Ice Hockey, and whenever it's been on television I've been happy to watch. Never actually physically gone to a game though. Various reasons, financial when I was unemployed but also simple planning given that we lived in Bridgend. Not a case of just a short trip round the corner.

However now we live in Penarth those things have now passed us. The Cardiff Devils are just a short journey away. It's Thursday. It's still the summer holidays. There's a match on.....why not?

Wife couldn't go but I decided to take daughter to watch the Cardiff Devils, British Ice champions play the Czech team Bili Tygri Liberec in the Champions Hockey League, the Champions League on ice.

They played in the "Ice Arena Wales" a place where you could skate in one ice arena and watch an ice hockey match afterwards. All they needed was a place for curling and a ski slope and they could boast a connect 4 for winter sports.

We went in. Bought some hot dogs and I noticed we were underdressed. More I think than any other sporting event I've been too the vast majority of people came dressed in replica shirts. Clearly they were believers.

So having gone to the back of the arena. Was told it would have the best seats if you wanted a good view. Was not lied to. All of a sudden the teams came out. The Cardiff Devils were given the raucous cheer of gladiators into the ring.....and they were only doing some training.

What was noticeable was the type of training. The Cardiff Devils would shoot the puck at the goalie from a different but fixed position whereas the Czechs would skate and repeatedly shoot to the same position.

The announcer, North American, I'll guess Canadian came on to read out the teams. Personally I felt he missed something here. He really could have been more clichéd American.

For example

"MARVELLOUS MATT MYERS"

"MATT....MR INFALLIBLE....POPE"

"ANDREW PRAISE BE LORD"

(By the way I noticed that on either team there was a man wearing the words "top scorer" on it. I mean why not put a target on his back?)

Anyway the match eventually began. And quite early on the Devils scored. People rose up in praise. Including, to my surprise, my daughter.

Then there were breaks. There are many breaks in hockey. Penalties, fights (many fights) and my favourite, Power Breaks. From now on I'm going to tell people when I make a cup of tea that I'm off on a power break.

Back to the game...the Devils scored again....devils delirium in the Capital. The fans (incidentally are Cardiff Devils fans called Satanists?) cheered again. After all they were the underdogs against a team and a country used to this sport at this level but they were losing.

However towards the end of the first period the Liberecs scored. Muted response apart from the music ("I Don't Care"). Lots of short spurted music in Ice Hockey, some appropriate, some just to clap your hands, pound your feet and some I didn't understand (Zorba The Greek anyone?)

There followed the longest designated four minutes I've ever known in sport where the clock was stopped for fights and players being sin binned. If Stephen Hawking ever watched an Ice hockey game then A Brief History Of Time would need to be rewriiten.

2-1 then after the first period. However on the second period the Czechs scored two quick goals to lead for the first time (also for the first time you realised the presence of Czech fans in the arena. Devils scored again but that was the final high point. For the rest of the game was sheer Liberec dominance, their experience in this level told.

The final score was 3-7.

You know what impressed me. The team lost by that score but the fans rose to a person to applaud their side. They knew they'd done their best.That included my daughter who later announced that she would to go again. Something that she's never said when I've taken her to watch a sport for the first time.

So we will, not exactly sure when but we will.

Until the next time.