The Atheist Case Against Halloween

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

Well come Wednesday will be Halloween. And as is customary I think in this blog where the grumpy old man part of me (which has always been there even when I was a teenager) attacks "customs" which are a set part of people's lives (Christmas is coming folks) perhaps it's time to chat about my hatred of Halloween.

So why don't I like Halloween ? After all the "pagan ritual" argument against it is of no interest to me given that most adults/children probably don't know or care anyway Well.....

1) In Britain when I grew up nobody celebrated Halloween : British children these days seem to think that Halloween is a traditional part of the British calendar. Not so. In the seventies and eighties November 5th was the key date. You celebrated Guy Fawkes being caught before blowing up Parliament with bonfires by creating a "guy", peddling your wears in front of shops so that adults would give them money and then watch your effigy of a terrorist being burnt at a bonfire after which there were fireworks,

I imply there that I created a Guy as well. Well no. My parents cottoned on quickly to me preferring that the money for fireworks was spent on comic book annuals instead. Everyone was happy.

The point is that whilst Guy Fawkes night still exists (and it's odd for me that even though he was part of a gang, indeed the Elizabethan equivalent of the getaway driver he's the one remembered) Halloween has taken over as the "event" and you can only assume that this was a business thing and not anything cultural. Another "marketing opportunity".

2) Trick or Treat....aka Payment With Menaces : For me the worst part of Halloween is when you open the door to a group of kids with no parents shouting "Trick or Treat!". For the fact there were no adults there meant that that it wasn't just a traditional Halloween greeting but a promise. You just know these kids will do something to the house if you don't give in......and so you do.

So children find Halloween educational.....in that threats work.

3) The Outfits: I do I must admit accept "traditional" Halloween fare, when those on the other side of the door dress up as witches or ghosts for example. But when you see children dress up as a serial killer from a TV series or film such as Scream you think come on.

4) Pumpkins: As we were talking about marketing opportunities I bet you Pumpkin growers praised whatever idol they worshipped in the cultural insertion of Halloween into people's lives.

Some people love pumpkins. The wife is a fan of the traditional Pumpkin latte from Starbucks. For me the best thing you can say about them is that they are edible.

The worst thing however is that rotting pumpkins, even shelled out corpses of rotting pumpkins stink. I cannot think of a worse smell coming out of a foodstuff. So of course if you're unlucky with the date of the next refuse collection then you're really screwed.

5) As A Parent You Have To Accept It: I said earlier that I don't have a "pagan festival" objection against it so I didn't stop my daughter getting involved. Hypocritical? I'd argue not. Unless she started suggesting witchcraft as a career there was no good reason to stop her participating in it with her friends

So just like having to watch Hanna Montana when daughter was younger. Halloween is something you put up with but would rather do something else.

Until the next time.