In Which We Now Know The Summer Of 2016 Is Two Days In July. Unfortunately For Me I'm Busy And Detained

Hello there. Hope you're feeling well today.

So this is the week, just before the schools close for the summer break and my wife and I become entertainment officers when the Ipad is unavailable, that hot weather has arrived in Bridgend.

It's only for a little while mind. The forecast was clear on that. Monday and Tuesday will be Mediterranean hot but Tuesday night/Wednesday morning will return to colder showery weather beginning with the clash and bang of thunder and lightening.

So what to do? Cut the grass on Tuesday whilst on Monday go and get some books from the library and then go up to the Rhondda Valleys to wallow in the views? Now that seems like an idea and a half.

Unfortunately that was Sunday morning me talking. Monday morning me knew that that was not going to happen...because my daughter was not going to school.

We had a Sunday afternoon lunch with my mother down from Essex to celebrate her birthday at a venue chosen by her I suspect because it had an intrinsically snob value. If you would describe this place as a TV channel it would be ITV3,all Downton Abbey and Midsomer Murders.

Despite all of this though the food was at best edible. There were Glamorgan sausages for a starter that my daughter described as tasting like Mozzarella Bites. For the main course whilst the others had lamb I had the pork. It was dull. To be honest I couldn't wait to leave and get home.

Anyway the point is that after the meal my daughter said she felt ill. A few hours later she was vomiting chunks of lamb down the toilet. I too was feeling uneasy around the stomach but nowhere near as bad. My mother,seventy five years old, felt fine.

Thankfully once the recycled remains of Larry went out of her system she was OK. Still school on Monday was out of the question, as indeed on Tuesday. Because she was going on a school trip to Oakwood Leisure Park and the idea of someone with an upset stomach on rides and roller coasters was a complete non starter. So the heatwave was going to be spent at home.

And my day further decided itself after my wife received a call from the estate agent. There was to be a viewing on Tuesday at 6:30pm. That was it. I had to cut the grass.

My wife said I was mad. Why do it now? Why not wait until the evening? But no I was adamant. Get it over with and do it today. So whilst I can't speak for Mad Dogs after a ham sandwich and a cup of tea this Englishman went out in the midday (12:10pm to be precise) Welsh sun.

And so for the next few hours that grass was cut. When it was finished I was red in the face and dripping in the back. Oh and to the people in my street wondering what caused the sudden outbreak of flying ants (some of which made a bee line (or is it ant line?) to the kitchen which I killed armed with a copy of my mother's Daily Mail). Well I might have disturbed a colony that decided to retaliate by going all fighter squadron on any targets nearby......so sorry. What with trying to sell the house and now this our popularity rating is really going down probably the same place my daughter's lamb went.

So that's how I spent one half of the summer of 2016. As for the other half? I doubt it will be as lively.

Until the next time.